Dentures of Peril

by The Spitshine Kid

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  • Immediate download of 17-track album in your choice of 320k mp3, FLAC, or just about any other format you could possibly desire.

    **PLUS BONUS ITEMS!**

    An unreleased bonus track: "Soul of Any Indian" - not available anywhere else.

    PLUS!
    17 images of original artwork that I made for you! well, not for you specifically. includes paintings and drawings.

     $6 USD  or more

     

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about

Low fi folk, punk, rock, jazz and a little comedy - all hydraulically scrunched into one cd and then freshly sealed in a sardine tin. More hooks than a slaughterhouse. Sure to make you queasy with delight.

This low minor-masterpiece was recorded on New York's Lower East Side (in my bedroom using Gargeband). it's my first album but hey, 5 of the songs received honorable mention from the Billboard International Songwriting Competition. For real!

credits

released June 1, 2008

Spitshine Kid (aka Steve Savitz) - vocals and instruments except:
Lead rapper on 99 Cents: Mr Clown

cover art: Steve Savitz

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The Spitshine Kid New York, New York

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Track Name: forgot you anyway
FORGOT YOU ANYWAY

Words and music by The Spitshine Kid
© 2005, Steve Savitz

CAN’T MAKE YOU HAPPY
SO I MIGHT AS WELL MAKE YOU SAD
CAN’T MAKE YOU ANGRY
SO I MIGHT AS WELL DRIVE YOU MAD

YOU MAKE ME LONELY
I’M A LONELY MAN ABOUT TOWN
YOU WERE MY ONE AND ONLY
DON’T KNOW WHY I STUCK AROUND

DON’T MEAN A THING
FORGOT YOU, FORGOT YOU
DON’T MEAN A THING
FORGOT YOU ANYWAY

GONNA’ TEAR MY HEAD OFF
LET IT SAIL CROSS THE DEEP BLUE SEA
I CAN’T LET YOU GET OFF
NOT WITHOUT AN SOS FROM ME

I CAN SEE YOUR EYES THINKING
OH, HOW YOU WISH I WAS SOMEONE NEW
I CAN SEE YOUR LIPS SYNCHING
ALL OF THE WORDS TO I LOVE YOU

DON’T MEAN A THING
FORGOT YOU, FORGOT YOU
DON’T MEAN A THING
FORGOT YOU ANYWAY

I SPIT YOUR NAME OUT OF MY THROAT
NO MORE PAIN, JUST A SQUASHED FOOTNOTE
ALL THAT REMAINS ARE THE LETTERS THAT YOU WROTE

I THINK ABOUT YOU
I THINK ABOUT YOU
A THING ABOUT YOU
I KNOW A THING ABOUT YOU

A THING ABOUT YOU
I SING ABOUT YOU
NOTHING ABOUT YOU
I NEVER THINK ABOUT YOU

I SING ABOUT YOU
I NEVER THINK ABOUT YOU
YEAH, I KNOW A THING
OR TWO ABOUT YOU

I KNOW YOU NEVER THINK ABOUT ME
I NEVER THINK ABOUT YOU
YOU NEVER SING ABOUT ME

YOU-OOOUUU
I THINK ABOUT YOU
(man, how come you’re never singin’ about me?)
I THINK ABOUT YOU
(what about my needs? I feel like I’m talkin’ to a ghost)
ABOUT YOU
ABOUT YOU
(you gonna’ miss me bad!)
ABOUT YOU
ABOUT YOU
(you’ll see)
ANYWAY, YEAH
ANYWAY, YEAH

I THINK ABOUT YOU
I THINK ABOUT YOU
A THING ABOUT YOU
I KNOW A THING ABOUT YOU…Etc.
Track Name: down to the riverside
DOWN TO THE RIVERSIDE
Words and music by The Spitshine Kid
© 2005, The Spitshine Kid

Em / D
Ready to go down to the riverside
Em / D
Gonna’ pawn all my things, gonna’ run and hide

Em / D C Em
Gonna wash my sins in the riverside
Em D
Ready to go down for the final ride

Em D Em
Gonna’ go and leave all my things behind

See what tomorrow brings in the river tide
Em / D C Em
Gonna run, gonna’ leave all my things behind
Em D
Ready to go down to the riverside

Em D
There’s nothin’ for me here.
Em D
I guess that much is clear
Em D
no one to shed a tear
C Em
Oh yeah
Em D Em
Gotta run before they take me alive

Em D
There’s nothing for me here
Em D
Tired of this noise
Em D C Em
Men my age used to be dead
Em D C
Many centuries ago
Em D Em
Many centuries ago

Em D
There’s nothin’ for me here.
Em D
I’m tired of this noise
Em D C Em
Every one I know is dead
Em D C Em
And there’s no where left to go

Em / D Em
Gotta’ leave this place
Em / D Em
Before I lose my face
Em / D Em
Gonna’ leave here soon
Em / D Em
Following the moon
D C
This planet has a blind spot
C D
It’s called reason
D
It’s called Reason
Track Name: pavlov was a punk rocker
i don't have the lyrics handy but this is the original poem that the song came from:


Your tears are like bullets
Every one one is meant to pierce
I want retribution
But my heart is switchin gears

Who am I and what must I give up?
Who am I and what must I give up?
Accept embrace unwind and absolve
Surrender to the pain but what have we solved?

You’re like an old headline and a stale cigar
You kidnapped my integrity and stuffed it in a jar

I’m tired of watchin over me
I’m tired of goin to class
Just lookin for some ovaries
So shove it up your ass

You smoked a camel thru your pediatric teeth
And your Cotton t-shirt clingin to what’s hangin’ underneath
When you drive me to crazy you can look me in the eye
Underneath the eucalyptis I’ll be hangin out to dry

You’re ornamentation in a surplus world
You want an ovation but you’re just an average girl

Your addle-brained emotion’s always running away
Your thoughts are so transparent I can see to yesterday

I’m out of hope and I’m out of wish
Just give me some rope and let it swish
Track Name: stay away from people
STAY AWAY FROM PEOPLE
© 2005, Steven Savitz


People come out
They follow you out
They call you up
When you least expect

People go out, yeah
they cough and they shout
they fill you with doubt
no, I don’t want company

You sneeze and you cough
You smell like a trough
Your fabric softener
Makes it hard to breathe

Those vapors and fumes
And the mold in your rooms
I can’t shake you off
all your perfume and cigarettes

Stay away – stay away
Stay away from people
Stay away – stay away
Stay away from people

Don’t come around – don’t tell your father
Don’t come around - you are not my friend
Don’t come around - don’t know why do you bother
I smell your scent comin’ round the bend.
Don’t come around with your insect repellent
Don’t come around with your hairspray on
Don’t come around with your nail polish smellin’
Don’t come around
Don’t come around
Don’t come around
Don’t come around


Stay away
I can see you’re gonna want a favor
Stay away
You’re offending me in 50 flavors
Stay away
I can see you’re just biding your time, yeah
Stay away
Go away, I’m enjoyin my meal now

People comin’ by on visiting day
I tell them all to go away
I’m not taking on any friends right now
So don’t come around
Don’t come around
Don’t come around
Don’t come around

Stay away
Your fabric softener’s givin’ me a migraine
Stay away
Your cigarette is clouding up in my brain
Stay away
I had enough of your big opinions
Stay away
I don’t wanna be one of your minions

I know that we don’t see eye to eye
Go away, don’t touch my pillow

No, I don’t want a ginger ale,
Can’t have no bread, can’t have no sugar

Your intentions are loaded, yeah
I can tell, I can tell by your inflection

Your cologne is makin’ me crazy
Stay away, stay away for your protection

God bless those afflicted
From this rare disease
These chemical sensitivities
Have got me on my knees

I miss all my drinking
And I miss all my fun
Environmental illness
Has got me on the run

All these fumes are foggin’ up my brain, yeah
Go away, I don’t remember my own name.
Stay away
Don’t come back now, ya’all now
Stay away
Stay away, don’t forget your iPod

People coming by on visiting day.
Track Name: kamikaze man
KAMIKAZE MAN
© 2005. Steven Savitz

If I knew right from wrong, baby
I’d probably steal your car
And drive it thru the auto wash
And then I’d break your heart

Whatever game you’re playin’
the house will always win
the righteous, they all suffer
and waste away in beds

thru their slits in bandages
dying without knowing
Your memories will disappear
But your toenails keep on growin’

Just when you’re awakening
that’s when they pull the plug
you say this can’t be happening
peering out from the ditch you dug

Just when you’re awakening, oh yeah.

The dogs of want, they run
Into a fenced alley
The clock is always tickin’ now
My cells are changin’ me

The retro-virus gets stronger
The spirit fizzles out
The stylus of the diamond
digs deeper grooves each round

Oh, Pithecanthropus
I know didn’t have no choice
I hear a contradiction
Deep within your voice
In your voice
in your voice
in your voice

Depression has evolved from this
Rigid social life
Take me to Soutine’s house
or the iris of Van Gough’s eye

So I too, may see the candy
Yellow sweetness of
This peasant’s life is not for rent
This heart is not for love

Stop me if I played this one
But it’s the critic’s choice
Goodbye Hunter S Thompson
Hello Village Voice

Pithecanthropus Man
Doin’ what i understand
this life is for suffering
I heard that from Ayn Rand

This planet is lost in space
I die for you on camera
When I look at the Everglades
I’m at a loss of palabras.

Kamikaze man on call
When the end just can’t be stopped
Jones’n for the atom bomb
Be careful, we just mopped
Track Name: daddy's tale (live)
Daddy’s tale
© The Spitshine Kid (aka Steve Savitz)

Daddy doesn’t go pickin thru the garbage anymore
Daddy doesn’t smoke crack with a 2 bit Juarez whore
Ever since I landed in jail
They use my ass as a garbage pail
So I don’t go pickin’ thru the garbage any more

Your daddy ain’t a doctor or a lawyer
But he makes his daily porn shop reconnoiter

Well I drinks my thunderbird
While my horse is always comin in third
took a bath with a pidgeon
While I read him The new york post
Track Name: dog vs hydrogen bomb
DOG VS. HYDROGEN BOMB
© 2006, The Spitshine Kid


I’M JUST A LITTLE MAN
THE WORLD’S TOO BIG FOR ME
OH –OH OH

BE NICE TO ME BABY
CAUSE YOU KNOW IT AIN’T MY FAULT
YOU COME SWINGIN THROUGH THE WINDOW
ON A CORDLESS PHONE
AND YOU PUT ME THROUGH GESTALT
SO MANY TIMES
THE TIDE CHANGES
EVERY TIME SHOVE TURNS AROUND
PUSH IS SNIFFIN IT’S FAT ASS

YOU CAN’T SHAKE THIS YO YO OFF YOUR FINGER, YEAH
OH –OH OH OH

AND DOG SITS ON A CHAIN
SITTIN’ IN THE RAIN
AND A 4 FOOT DOMAIN
AIN’T VERY MUCH FUN
AIN’T VERY MUCH FUN
‘TILL YOU TOSS ME A HYDROGEN BOMB

BUT I FETCH IT ON MY DOG LEASH
‘CUASE IT’S A DOGGIE THING TO DO
AND I LOSE 7 YEARS FOR EVERY 1 OF YOURS
AND PRETTY SOON, BABY I’LL TURN 42

AND YOU SAY YOU GOT A SAD, SAD STORY
ONE THAT DON’T FADE OUT TOO SLOW
WELL, YOU DON’T HAVE A CLUE
HOW MUCH I’D RATHER BE YOU
THAN DOWN HERE WHERE THE BLOSSOMS DON’T GROW, YEAH

I’M SITTIN’ ON A CHAIN SITTIN’ IN THE SUN
IT AIN’T VERY MUCH FUN, YEAH
BUT YOU TOSS ME A HYDROGEN BOMB
AND I FETCH ‘CAUSE IT’S A DOG THING TO DO
BUT I LOSE 7 YEARS FOR EVERY 1 OF YOURS
AND PRETTY SOON I WILL TURN 42

(guitar gently weeps)

AND I’M STANDING ON THE PORCH AT 3 AM
WITH RIVULETS STREAMING DOWN
MY CROOKED ABS
YOU TAKE A FRIGHTENED STEP BACK
AS YOU LEAN OVER THE WOODEN RAILING, YEAH
YOUR ASS WAGGIN’ ME AND YOUR HAIR SPILLING OUT
LIKE MOSS OVER THE GARDEN DISTRICT

IT WAS SO SWELTERING YOU COULD
SCRATCH MY DEAD SKIN
LIKE ICING UNDERNEATH YOUR NAILS
AND YOU’RE SHOWING ME PICTURES THAT YOU DREW
YOU REALLY DO GOT SOMETHING GIRL

MY HEART WAS POUNDIN WITH FEAR
WHEN YOU DANCED IN THE HYDRANT
ON A RUN-DOWN STREET OVER BY LOUIE ARMSTRONG’S
CEMETARY

WE SHOULD’VE MADE IT TO
PRESERVATION HALL
A LOT OF THINGS WE SHOULD’VE DONE, YEAH
BUT LIFE DON’T HAVE NO
INVENTORY WAREHOUSE
WHERE YOU CAN CROSS THINGS OFF YOUR LIST
YOU WERE COUNTING COCKROACHES
AND PUTTIN’ THEM BACK
ON BOURBON STREET

IN THE MOONLIGHT AT 3AM
IN THE MOONLIGHT AT 3AM

YOU TUSSLED WITH ME IN BED FOR A SPELL
BEFORE YOU RAN OUT, YEAH,
I HEARD YOU GASPING
GIRL I HEARD YOU GASPING
OH YEAH
Track Name: crack a breathing hole
CRACK A BREATHING HOLE FOR ME
© 2006, Steve Savitz

YESTERDAY BETRAYED ME
TOMORROW WALKS WITH A NIGHTSTICK SWINGIN’
I CAN HEAR THE WHISTLE
ALL THE WAY DOWN
DOWN THE CORRIDOR
CAN’T FOOL ME
CAN’T FOOL ME

THE CORRIDOR BLEW OPEN
BUT ALL I SEE ARE THE TORCHES LIT

WHEN THE ICE SLIDES OVER MY HEAD
I’LL BE BACK IN THE FREEZING WATER
WITHOUT AIR
IF YOU HAPPEN TO SEE ME
CRACK A BREATHIN HOLE FOR ME
IF YOU HAPPEN TO SEE ME
CRACK A BREATHIN HOLE FOR ME
CRACK A BREATHIN HOLE FOR ME
WITH YOUR NIGHTSTICK

NO ONE HERE BELIEVES ME
BUT SOON YOU’LL KNOW THAT I WASN’T JOKIN’
THE EAGLE FLIES ABOVE ME
CIRCLING AROUND
MY GRAVE

IF YOU HAPPEN TO SEE ME
CRACK A BREATHIN HOLE FOR ME
IF YOU HAPPEN TO SEE ME
CRACK A BREATHIN HOLE FOR ME
CRACK A BREATHIN HOLE FOR ME
WITH YOUR NIGHTSTICK
Track Name: spitshine talks
to get lyrics, send an 8x10 glossy and a dead creeping charlie to tom waits.
Track Name: black eyed uzi
BLACK EYED UZI
© 2004, Steven Savitz (The Spitshine Kid)

I don’t know where I’m going to
And I don’t know where I been

Like a light inside a firefly
I’m gliding on belief

I don’t know why
I even care to try
But I’m crazy man, that’s me.

Got a key in my pocket
But unlike you
It don’t own me any more

I hope that you’ll still visit me
Through the spokes of my misery

I know I am a living ghost
Out the corner of your eye

‘Cause I’m thru with doors
And windows and the mirror
And the telephone and wine

I don’t know why
I’m laughin and I’m cryin’
But I’m crazy man, crazy man.

And I don’t think I
Can even bat an eye
This time, black baby this time, this time

Welcome to my night
It’s a Hindenberg blaze
but I just can’t seem
To unwind this maze.

I can’t run away
cause I’m stepping on a mine
got my shoes hangin’ up
on the telephone line

You can set your sights
On the crown of my head
You can pull all the triggers
Till I’m poisoned with lead

Forever has no meaning
When you’re living day to day
A thousand years are smoking
In the crucible of love

Aiding and abetting
While you just sit back and watch
a televised beheading
Only takes a pint of scotch

You’re canvassing my town
With the promises you made
But you bomb every village
‘Till we all fade away

Crawlin on my side
through a pile of debris
you’re a tanker full of pride
and you’re burnin up the sea

See how they scatter
When the devil’s at their door
Watch em all start to run
When the rain begin to pour

Too late for religion
Though you need it more and more

I have to write this epitaph
‘Fore they nail me to the door

My planet drifts away from this
And there’s nothing that I can do.
Track Name: 99 Cent Store
99 CENT STORE
© 2005, Steven Savitz (The Spitshine Kid)

Not hungry, not starving, got some money to spend
I see a 99 cent store comin’ round the bend
I look in the window and I can’t resist
Watch out boys, I got a shopping list

Snapple and popcorn and Chef Boy Aur Dee
Sunshine dog food and Chicken of the Sea

99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
I brough home twice as much as I was sent for
99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
Think of all the money I’ll have to pay the rent for

Ponchos! – (chorus) 99 cents!
Cat food! – (chorus) 99 cents!
Gourmet pickles! -- (chorus) 99 cents!
Tea biscuits! – (chorus) 99 cents!

Cracker Jax, Ajax and Borax too
Windex, Stridex and Wheat Chex and glue

No need for a holdup, I put down my Gatt
At 99 cents, even I’ll pay for that

There’s so much to choose from and so much in stock
Here’s rubber erasers to put on my—(BLEEP)

Number two pencils and VO5,
Palmolive and olives and birthday cake jive

99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
I brough home twice as much as I was sent for
99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
This is what one stop shopping was meant for

Non-skid tub mats ….(chorus) 99 cents!
Twist towels!..(chorus) 99 cents!
Epoxy!…(chorus) 99 cents!
Foxy…(chorus) Lady!

No need for price tags, no need for receipts
No need to price check these Hormel lunch treats

Index cards and coconut cookies
so much crème, you’ll be squealin’ like a wookie

Lint free cheesecloth and Sara Lee cheesecake
So many note books it’ll make your knees quake

Shower caps, oven mits and a meat thermometer
I can see paper goods for a good kilometer

99 cent Store, 99 Cent Store
I brough home twice as much as I was sent for
99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
this is what livin’ the good life was meant for

Who would have thought
that all of life’s treasures
Could be so easily bought
for such reasonable measures

Some say the city has got no charm
I’d like to see them buy all this stuff on the farm

Pakistan merchants you did a good thing
For 99 cents you can live like a king.

Finally my wallet’s on even footing
Look at all this Snack Pack pudding

99 cent Store, 99 Cent Store
I brough home twice as much as I was sent for
99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
this is what livin’ the good life was meant for

Talk about getting a bang for your buck
You get a penny back and you can keep it for luck

99 cent Store, 99 Cent Store
I brough home twice as much as I was sent for
99 Cent Store, 99 Cent Store
this is what livin’ the good life was meant for
Track Name: Andromeda
ANDROMEDA
© 2005, The Spitshine Kid

LIKE A SKEWER THRU THE HEART
THIS GHOST NEVER STAYS SHARP
THE ANSWER NEVER COMES FROM
BEHIND I GOT A QUESTION MARK AND
MANY YEARS AGO
IT TRAVELS AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT
SOME DAY I’LL GET TO ANDROMEDA

THE BLUES FLASH THEIR LIGHTS ON ME
AND THE SHUTTLE ALWAYS LANDS IN THE SEA

MY THOUGHTS ARE REALLY WEIRD
JUST LIKE WET RAGS
THEY ALWAYS BUNDLE ME BUT ONLY MAKE ME COLD
THEY BUNDLE ME BUT ONLY
MAKE ME COLD

LIKE AN ARROW THRU MY BRAIN I’M ONLY
ONE STROKE FROM INSANE
I WISH UPON THE MOON BEYOND THE STARS
BEYOND MY WINDOW PANE
AND MANY YEARS AGO I
TRAVELED AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT
AND SOME DAY I’LL GET TO ANDROMEDA

AND THE BLUES FLASH THEIR LIGHT’S ON ME
AND THE METRONOME CLICKS IN MY KNEE
WELL MY SPACESHIP RADIO’S DEAD IT’S GOING SQUAWK SQUAWK SQUAWK
NOW I MUST LIVE ON PLANET EARTH ETERNALLY
I MUST LIVE ON PLANET EARTH ETERNALLY

MY HEART IS ALWASYS DRIVING ME
INTO THE RENTAL LOT
BACKING THRU THE EXIT SPIKES
TILL THE TIRES ALL GO POP
OH YEAH

ONE DAY I WANT TO SEE
ALL MY FRIENDS IN 1 PLACE
BILL WEENER AND WILLY AND
CLOWN AND KNG AND RALPH AND RON AND RON
AND SHUKOVSKY AND NICK
AND MAN AND MIKE AND STU
AND CRAZY DENNIS TOO AND
ANDY

A FINE DAY WE’LL ALL HAVE
A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
MARIA AND MITAS AND LESLIE TOO
AND KATIE AND ALL THE REST

A FINE DAY WE’LL ALL HAVE
AS WE COMPETE
TO SEE WHO GOT THE CHEAPEST SPACEFARE

A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
A FINE DAY WE’LL HAVE
WHEN WE COMPETE
TO SEE WHO GETS
THE CHEAPEST
SPACEFARE
Track Name: let it rot
LET IT ROT
© The Spitshine Kid


Let the sink drip
let the sky fall
let your pants slip
let your skin crawl
let the clock tick
let the food spoil
strike the match stick
to the crude oil
let the mountains crumble
let the roads decay

let the gangs fight
let the president lie
let the trees ignite
let the 3rd world die
let the sky darken
let the glaciers melt
let the knives sharpen
let the point be felt
let the poor go hungry
let the fires rage

let the pipes rust
let the factories blow
let the banks bust
let the weeds grow
let the races clash
let the coffins float
let the markets crash
let them steal the vote
let the armies dwindle
let the bodies rot

let the smoke kindle
let the bodies rot
let the bodies stack
Ahhh